Trust Cannes for cooking up a storm in both the Internet and the blogosphere – revealing today a super-sexy, orgasm-worthy list of films playing back-to-back at the Croisette next month when the Festival de Cannes kicks off. Essentially the Olympics for the arthouse crowd, Cannes never fail to serve up a catalogue of muscular artistic credibility year after year. Just look at that lineup – the world’s finest auteurs are descending down to the Palais des Festival to battle it out for the Palme d’Or. The Dardenne brothers, David Cronenberg, Mike Leigh, Ken Loach, Oliver Assayas, Nuri Bilge Ceylan, Atom Egoyan, Olivier Dahan will all head-butt against Bennett Miller, Tommy Lee Jones, Michel Hazanavicius and Xavier Dolan (who finally graduates into the Big League, with his fifth feature Mommy playing in Official Competition). It’s a late apology for his masterful Laurence Anyways, if you ask me. However, before you count your chickens, prepare the French Riviera to part halfway through as the Grand Master of French Cinema Jean-Luc Godard is returning to Côte d’Azur with his 3D (gulp) comeback Adieu au Langage (Goodbye to Language).
There are also plenty of fishes to catch outside the Competition strand, as Baby Goose Ryan Gosling’s directorial debut will play in the Un Certain Regard section, alongside films from Mathieu Almaric, Wim Wenders, Ruben Oslund, Asia Argento and Ned Benson, whose Eleanor Rigby with Jessica Chastain and James McAvoy sits on top of my must-see list. Hot favourite Zhang Yimou also has a film out of competition – and failing to see all of that, there’s always How To Train Your Dragon 2. Hurrah!
But before you clap your eyes to all of these films listed below, we’ll all have to deal with Nicole Kidman first, expected to glide the red-carpet and open the festival as the Mother of all Glamourpusses, Princess Grace Kelly in Olivier Dahan’s much-publicised Grace of Monaco.
And because I love you, dear readers. I’ve copy-pasted the entire list from the OFFICIAL Festival de Cannes website.
You’re welcome.
IN COMPETITION
Opening Film
Grace of Monaco, Dir. Olivier Dahan
***
Sils Maria, Dir. Olivier Assayas
Saint Laurent, Dir. Bertrand Bonello
Kis Uyksu (Winter’s Sleep), Dir Nuri Bilge Ceylan
Deux Jours, Une Nuit (Two Days One Night), Dirs. Jean-Pierre and Luc Dardenne
Mommy, Dir. Xavier Dolan
Captives, Dir. Atom Egoyan
Maps to the Stars, Dir. David Cronenberg
Adieu au Langage (Goodbye to Language), Dir. Jean-Luc Godard
The Search, Dir. Michel Hazanavicius
The Homesman, Dir. Tommy Lee Jones
Futatsume No Mado (Still the Water), Dir. Naomi Kawase
Mr. Turner, Dir Mike Leigh
Jimmy’s Hall, Dir. Ken Loach
Foxcatcher, Dir. Bennett Miller
Le Meraviglie, Dir. Alice Rohrwacher
Timbuktu, Dir Abderrahmane Sissako
Relatos Salvajes (Wild Tales), Dir. Damian Szifron
Leviathan, Dir Andrey Zvyagintsev
UN CERTAIN REGARD
Opening Film
Party Girl, Dir. Marie Amachoukeli, Claire Burger and Samuel Theis
***
Amour Fou, Dir. Jessica Hausner
Bird People, Dir. Pascale Ferran
The Blue Room, Dir. Mathieu Amalric
Charlie’s Country, Dir. Rolf De Heer
Eleanor Rigby, Dir. Ned Benson
Fantasia, Dir. Wang Chao
A Girl At My Door, Dir. July Jung
Harcheck mi Headro, Dir. Keren Yedaya
Jauja, Dir. Lisandro Alonso
Lost River, Dir. Ryan Gosling
The Misunderstood, Dir. Asia Argento
Run, Dir. Philippe Lacote
Salt Of The Earth, Dir. Wim Wenders & Juliano Ribeiro Salgado
Snow In Paradise, Dir. Andrew Hulme
Titli, Dir. Kanu Behl
Tourist, Dir. Ruben Ostlund
Unhappy Youth, Dir. Jaime Rosales
Xenia, Dir. Panos Koutras
OUT OF COMPETITION
Coming Home, Dir. Zhang Yimou
How To Train Your Dragon 2, Dir. Dean DeBlois
MIDNIGHT SCREENINGS
The Rover, Dir. David Michod
The Salvation, Dir. Kristian Levring
The Target, Dir. Chang
SPECIAL SCREENINGS
Bridges Of Sarajevo, (Anthology Film)
Caricaturists: Fantasies Of Democracy, Dir. Stephanie Valloatto
Eau Argentee, Dir. Mohammed Ossana
Les Gens Du Monde, Dir. Yves Yeuland
Maidan, Dir. Sergei Loznitsa
Red Army, Dir. Polsky Gabe
Once you’ve finished gaping at that list, I’ll leave you with amazing 67th Edition Cannes poster, with the Epitome of Italian Cool, Marcelo Mastroainni, gazing through those dapper specs as captured by Frederico Fellini in 8 1/2.
Because nobody does classy festival posters like Cannes.
